The title of this entry might be a little misleading. Although I do regard the game of baseball as a beautiful creation, a perfect balance of control and aggression, power and finesse, explosive instant gratification and slow burning satisfaction, it has its way reminding you just how fragile success can be. I mean this both from an individual and team aspect.
Since my last entry, I've had quite a roller coaster ride in terms of personal performance. My outing in Huntsville ended up with 5 runs over an inning and two thirds with possibly one hard hit ball to account for the damage along with 5 seeing eye singles. I've thrown 3 times since them with much better results. In a lot of ways, my past 2 weeks epitomize the life of a reliever. One tough outing may take weeks to undo, and that's only if you have no other slip ups along the way. The best thing one can do is remain positive and remain consistent in one's approach. The second you start stressing and second guessing your abilities is the second you start losing ground on the competition. I feel confident more and more that I can pitch successfully in this level and the next, but it requires a level of focus and execution that is elevated from previous levels of pro-ball. But personal struggles aside, our team is 3 for its last 13 and is currently on a 5 game slide. This type of run, as you may imagine, doesn't do much for a team's confidence. I've been on streaks like this before and its always the same situation. There is never one symptom that is the cause of the problem, rather a combination of poor execution on a variety of levels that keep victories just out of reach. The only blessing is that it is a long long season and even the struggles we are having now will not doom us yet. We still have plenty of time to "right the ship" and make a run to put us right back in playoff contention.
In other news, the girlfriend is coming in to town when I return from this current road trip for Memorial Day weekend. For whatever reason, the distance seems harder on her this year and the previous year. I'm think the time together here will certainly be beneficial to ease the stress. The rising gas prices (and plane tickets) are not making things any easier on our attempts to see each other though. It's just another tough reality of being a minor league ball player. We simply don't make enough to be buy plane tickets every month and still manage to break even, let along save any money. Its certainly a test of responsibility and self denial when you get your paycheck and basically must dedicate it all to bills. I'm not sure if its a produ`t of today's society or my personal selfishness, but I find it difficult save every last dime. To put it bluntly, sometimes I just want to spend some of the money I make on me. I guess at some point that is no longer a good excuse. That point is usually about the same time my credit card bill comes.
Time to tighten up. Another game in Jackson, Tennesee tomorrow.
Until next time...God Bless.
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